Imagine the Department of Justice inspector general (IG) conducting a review of the Jeffrey Epstein case. It might read something like this: "While it is clear that Mr. Epstein abused minor girls, there is no documentary or testimonial evidence that he was motivated by a deviant sexual interest in those young girls." The newly released IG investigation into FBI abuses of the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act (FISA) enshrines the report's main catchphrase ?" "documentary or testimonial evidence" ?" in the hall of fame for legalese absurdities.